Blue Pokeballs
by Astrid C. Giese-Zimmer
Summary: A really dumb fic that's sick and funny at the same time. So I know you'll love it!


Blue Pokeballs  
by Astrid Giese-Zimmer  
  
Disclaimers: Pokemon is owned by Nintendo, who oughta release more episodes of Super Mario Bros. Super Show on DVD. This fanfic is rated VS for Very Stupid.  
  
Warning: Queershipping, Lolicon, over the top gay stereotypes, and above all bad taste.  
  
One day, Ash, May, Max, and Brock were walking through the woods as they always do, looking for some town or something. Pikachu jumped on Ash's shoulder and said (awww). Ash smiled, being too retarded to notice that May and Brock had their hands on eachother's asses. Max was looking at that computer thing he always has, so he didn't notice either. Suddenly, Ash fell to the ground.   
Everyone stopped walking. What's wrong, Ash? Asked May.  
Ash rubbed his forehead. I dunno, I kinda feel funny... in my pants. He looked down and saw that his Pokeballs fell out of his pocket, but they were a different color. WAAGH! My POKEBALLS! THEY'RE BLUE!  
said Brock I've had this problem many times before. The only cure for it is..  
Is? IS?  
A good woman!  
Ash facefaulted and got up. Well, if that's the cure, could May help me out here?  
May sweatdropped. Sorry, Ash, but Brock's my man!  
questioned Ash.  
That's right, I don't need a Jenny or Joy since I've got May! replied Brock. Brock and May kissed on the lips, which soon led to various fondling under the clothes.  
Ash narrowed his eyes Wait a minute, isn't May only 10?  
Brock said Yeah, but she's got fabulous boobs!  
Plus, he's only 15 so we're both underage. Also, being in an anime series helps. May added, winking.  
Brock and May fell to the ground in passion. May took off her jacket, shirt, and bra, revealing her spectacular breasts to the world. The fanboys cheered, and the FCC had a collective heart attack, and Ed from Cowboy Bebop said Okay, so how come Ed is 13 and doesn't have those?  
As May and Brock contiued to have sex, Ash walked off into the woods and said Fuck you guys.  
  
Meanwhile, in another part of the woods, Team Rocket was hungry. And horny.  
Oh, Jaaaames... said Jessie, with seduction in her voice.  
Yes eeeee! squealed James, more girlishly than normal.  
I know you're hungry, so maybe you like to eat. she winked and spread her legs.  
James blinked and said Actually, I could probably go for a big black cock right now.  
Jessies head got big.   
James fell to the ground, sobbing I can't help it! It's these damn dubbers! Ever since we went to Hoenn, they've been giving me more and more gay lines! They've turned me into an anime Mr. Humphries!  
Meowth shrugged. Let's face it, Jimmy-boy, yous does leaves yoself open what with da crossdressing and whatnot.  
James snapped back It'th thrictly a comfort thing! Oh no, I'm lithping! Thave me, Jethie! screamed James, prancing around uncontrolably.  
Jessie nodded. Come on, Meowth, we have to save James from becoming another outdated stereotype!  
Jessie flung James over her shoulder and ran towards the 4Kids building.  
  
Ash sat on a stump in the woods. WAAGH! I need release! he yelled.  
Pika pika (aww!)  
Hey, Pikachu, maybe you could...  
PIKA! Pika chu chu pika pi chu! (Roughly translated: Better not think about it, pal, or I'll shock your nuts off.)  
Ash sighed. At least Misty kinda liked me, but the one chance we had together...  
wobbly Wayne's World flashback  
Inside the Poke No Tell Motel  
Ash, you idiot, that's not my vagina, that's a throwpillow.  
end flashback  
Ash saw Jessie running by, carrying James. Hey, Team Rocket!  
Jessie stopped What do you want, Twerp?  
I was wondering, would either of you like to have sex with me?  
The Rockets turned green, collectivly. Jessie snapped First of all, I wouldn't touch you if you were the last man on earth, and secondly James is gay enough as it is!  
Yeah, why don't cha just beat off, kid! said Meowth. The Rockets ran off. Hurry, Jessie, I think my wrists are going limp!  
Ash got really mad and started cursing the world. BEAT OFF? That's what I've been doing for months! I'm sick of it! I need a nice hole now!  
  
  
Ash turned around and saw Max. Ash, I'm glad I found you. i was fiddling with my computer thing and heard some strange noises, and I turned around and saw squinty boy boinking my sister! I tried to stop them, but Brock realeased his Onix and it chased me into the woods! Ash? Why are you looking at me like that? Ash? AAAGH!  
  
At the 4Kids building, Jessie and Meowth were holding bazookas at the chairman's head while James danced to YMCA.  
said Jessie I didn't say there was anything wrong with being gay, I said it's just not James! We used to make love 5 times a night in the first season!  
Meowth groaned Believe me, I've hoid them.  
okay, okay said the chairman. He got on the phone with the Pokemon dub writers and told them to change James' personality from Homolicious Fruit to Bi and proud (the way it should be!). James stopped dancing and came over to Jessie. Jess, I've got a hankering for weiners AND tacos! Rrowl!  
asked the chairman  
replied Jessie.  
Come on, Jess, let's do it now! said James.  
Remember James, I'm the pitcher, you're the catcher!  
Eeee! I almost forgot!  
So Jessie and James put on their Revorlutionary Girl Utena outfits and skipped out the door arm in arm. And the Rocketshippers and Queershippers cheered, and the antishippers kicked their TVs in.  
  
May and Brock were asleep in the woods, naked and satisfied. May woke up and saw Ash sneaking out of the woods, buckling his belt with an evil smile on his face. Oh, hi Ash! Have fun in the woods?  
Oh, uh, yeah. chuckled Ash, nervously.  
Where's Max?  
Haven't seen him. said Ash, grinning evily.  
  
While Jessie and James were doing a little roleplaying in the bushes, Meowth was lonely. I wish I's hads someones to fuck with.  
Meowth looked over and saw Max crawling out of the bushes with his pants down, looking exausted. Meowth grinned evily. Dis is my lucky night.  
  
THE END  
(Dedicated to the sick freaks of the world)


End file.
